Two things I am passionate about are food and raising children. Combining the two I am somewhat ‘obsessed’ when it comes to feeding my daughter. We try to eat organic or homegrown as much as possible. I actually slightly freak every time she drinks milk that is not organic. I know I’m ridiculous, I told you I was obsessed. As a baby she was breastfed and only once ate food that I had not prepared myself (from a jar, duh duh duuuuuuh – we were at our friends campsite – needs must and all).
Oh I forget to mention I am also a recovering perfectionist ;) I say recovering because being a perfectionist and having a child is nigh on impossible, believe me! But seriously bringing a child into the world is the single most important thing I’ve ever done, damn right I’m going to try and do it to the best of my abilities.
So this gentle introduction about me gets me nicely onto the controversial subject of breastfeeding. I have always been a firm believer that breast is best (excuse the pun). After all mother nature provides us with the kit to care for our babies and you can always trust mother nature – she rocks! My own experience of breastfeeding only serves to strengthen my conviction of how wonderful it is.
I will be honest, I did judge people who didn’t breastfeed their children. Sure I know there are plenty who cannot breastfeed for whatever reason (fine) but I also know there are plenty who can and well just won’t…. and for this I could never quite ‘get’ the reason.
Having said that I am pretty much a live and let live type, sure I have my high standards but I can’t judge everyone by them. I try to leave people to get on with things how and as they please.
Recently I have been confronted with a close friend who is breastfeeding but wanting to stop because she dislikes it. Admittedly I found it very hard to deal with, a huge lump forming in my throat as she told me “but, but, but…” struggling with “it’s her choice” and “noooooooooooooooooo”. I found myself feeling quite angry about it afterwards, again not understanding her reasons why. How could you dislike breastfeeding? She had her reasons but they all sounded like excuses to me.
Well today I saw for myself the reasons why and without going into too much personal detail, I understood. I saw her struggling, unhappy and upset with breastfeeding her own child and all of a sudden I felt very bad for judging her. She didn’t need my guilt trip as the cherry on the top of a newborn baby cake.
I will always maintain that breast is best for me but next time I judge someone who is not breastfeeding I will remember there might be a million reasons why, many I may not understand. At the end of the day only a mother knows what is best for their baby and if it is affecting their well-being and making them really miserable I don’t believe they should struggle through it.
After all a happy mummy = happy baby.
I love this post! I breastfeed for 5 months and although I’m proud of what it did, I have to say I really struggled and was happy to give up. I felt A LOT of pressure especially as I work as a parenting website as parenting expert and thought I should be setting an example and knew ultimately it was the best thing to do, but when the time came, it was very hard in every possible way! I am happy to tell you though that my daughter is happy and very healthy. Like you I got annoyed by women who can’t be bothered to try but when you scratch the surface there is often a whole lot more to it. Your post en captures this perfectly, thank you! x x
Ah wow, I could have written this post word for word!
I am *hugely* proud that neither of my children have had even a sip of formula milk. I actually think it’s the thing I am most proud of in regards to how I parent my babies. I will admit that it kind of bothers me a bit when people just don’t even give it a go, but then my rational side reminds me that it’s none of my business how people choose to feed their kids.
True true. I have quite an emotional attachment to this “nameless” friend which is I think why I was so bothered by it ;)